SOCIAL PRESSURES AND RESPONSIBILITIES DURING ADOLESCENCE – I
As children, we learn a lot about what is sexually appropriate. We learn not to touch ourselves except in private. We also learn not to touch others in inappropriate places. As adolescents, the messages become more urgent. “Don’t have sex until you are married!” “Only bad teenagers have sex!” “Don’t even think about sex!” At the same time, our sexual bodies and feelings are urgently demanding our attention!
It’s hard to figure out what we should listen to and what we should ignore. Parents, politicians, educators, and religious organizations might prefer that we ignore the sexual part of our lives. And it may be difficult for our parents to think about us as sexual beings because they remember what it may have been like for them—confusing, exciting, daring, and dangerous. So they try to protect us from unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. They often suggest that we just say “No!”
Meanwhile, our friends and peers may be starting to date, going to make-out parties, and, as we get a little older, starting to think about having sex. First dating may start around 12 or 13. Group dating and coed parties are common. Kissing games are popular at these parties. A date may include going to the movies, bowling, or just hanging out. Going steady is still popular and is marked with symbolic gifts like bracelets, rings, caps, and jackets. Early in adolescence, however, we remain rather sexually conservative, usually believing that we should have sex only if we are married.
As we become older teenagers, however, our attitudes may change. Our peers may push us to become sexually active. This is known as peer pressure. Peer pressure can often move us to do positive things for ourselves—develop athletic skills, for example. It can also lead us to high-risk activities such as smoking, drinking, and drug taking.
It’s hard to resist peer pressure when the need to be accepted by our friends is so great. Being different—especially about sex—isn’t something our friends may consider “cool.” Our parents, on the other hand, often want us to put off sexual activity.
For many of us, the message is mixed. A son may be pushed to become sexually active by his father or older brother. A daughter may be encouraged by both parents to resist sexual activities. This is a double standard in which one set of rules applies to one person, and a different set applies to another person in the same situation.
There are other conflicting messages about sexuality in our society. Just as we may have strong desires not to disappoint our friends, we may have equally strong desires to please our parents. On the other hand, some of us may feel the normal desire to break away from our parents and set our own rules. We may feel we are ready for sexual activity, or we may want to have sex as a way of rebelling against our parents.
On one hand, we are told about all the bad things that happen to sexually active teenagers, such as unintended pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. But on the other hand, sexual attractiveness—being sexy—is highly valued. We learn both these lessons from TV, magazines, movies, and music videos.
*69/155/5*
Related Posts:
Tags: Men’s Health
No comments 
Category: