IDEAL MARRIAGE: ROMANTIC LOVE IS AN IMPULSE TO REDUCE SOCIAL AND PHYSICAL DISTANCE TO ZERO

Posted on May 28th, 2011, by admin
There is a certain limit, however, beyond which one should not go in allowing his reason to dominate his sense of beauty. That is the point at which one has to suppress certain physical repulsions. One should never think of marrying anyone, regardless of his or her character, unless one feels an almost instinctive comfort in the other’s presence and feels no revulsion at any physical contact. Romantic love is fundamentally an impulse to reduce social and physical distance to zero, if possible, and its chief value for marriage lies in this fact that it makes intimacy an unmixed pleasure, overcoming, as it does, some of the disgusts and aversions with which civilized men are perhaps over-blessed. It is all too easy for a married couple to develop a secret or open disgust for one another in many of the details of life, in spite of the most ardent, initial romantic feelings. So a man and woman should certainly not expect marriage to be a success if they enter it with some suppressed repulsions at the very start. A mature and intelligent person, accordingly, will school his sense of beauty so that it comes to be in harmony with his other interests, such as character, but he will not carry this rationalizing process so far that it does violence to the primary function of beauty and love—namely, to draw a man and woman together.
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